Ezra's First Photo Op

Much thanks to doll of a friend Jessica Lawler for taking these beautiful photos of Ezra.

Ezra's Birth

After my longwinded kind-of -freak-out at 38 weeks pregnant, I think the proceeding actual labor and delivery should get an equal amount of screen time here, yeah?

So the doctor I saw the day before my scheduled induction for October 1 wanted to see how baby was doing. I had a quick ultrasound. He measured well, apparently at about 8 lb. His heart rate was great, there was still amniotic fluid aplenty.  He was head down, low and I was already dilated 2 cm. (!!) She said I was very favorable for going into labor on my own, the baby's doing perfectly well--there's no medical reason to be induced early. Hurrah! Not only that, with membranes stripped she said she very strongly suspected I'd have that baby in the next 48 hours. Excelente. 

48 hours came and went, including a hike with our preschool group, carrying Noah half the way back, and several long walks in the neighborhood with Ben and the boys. Nothing. I felt fine. My due date October 2 came and went. BUT I woke up around 1am on October 3 to something. Contraction? 10 minutes later, another. It came on pretty gradually, but I guess this is early labor. Around 4am I had a few at 5 minutes apart and thought I was ready to go in. But then then next were about 10 minutes apart again. But by about 5am, though few and far between, they were strong enough to make me think we should go to the hospital. (Bless my sister Emily, my sister-in-law Anna and friend Melissa for watching Seth and Noah for us!)

We made the five minute drive, parked in Ben's parking garage and went to the 5th floor. Since my contractions were far apart I felt pretty good, pretty casual. The staff basically said I'd probably go home. But turns out I was dilated to a 4 or 5 at that point. I would be admitted. !

I said I'd be interested in getting an epidural when the anesthesiologist was out of the c-section. I stayed in a quiet triage for a bit while they got a room ready. The contractions were getting more intense but still about 8 minutes apart or so and lasting less than a minute. Pretty do-able. I felt like this was great. So great they wondered if I could even be progressing, but around 6:00 or 6:30am I was checked at a 5 or 6. 

I got put in a delivery room at 7am. I walked over and when I got there had several really strong contractions closer together. I told Ben I felt almost ready to push. Nurses and doc came in, I was at 9 cm. The anesthesiologist was in another emergency c-section. But the OB suggested if she broke my water it would fully dilate me and I'd be have that baby there in the next 10 or 15 minutes.

I was hesitant to consent because I know it feels a lot more intense and painful once the water is broken. And no time for an epidural? Upon asking Ben what he thought he reminded me if I waited for the anesthiologist it'd most likely be like with Noah, having to sit still on the edge of the bed while in transition/crowning. Right, let's not do that again. 

So we went ahead and had my water broken. I stayed lying in bed after that. And, as expected, it was a lot more painful. Also, frusteratingly, that urge to push had gone away. Even though I was fully dilated. (In retrospect if I had been standing again I think that would have helped.) I tried for an hour to push, but that urge just wasn't there. ?? Weird. Frustrating. Also concerning because the baby's heartrate kept decelerating. And, of course, still painful. Finally, the OB said if I couldn't push him out of the next push she'd have to use the vacuum. Contraction, push, no progress. So vacuum it is.

I was so, so glad they could get him out when I just could not do it. It reminded me of how my great-grandma Emma did not have that option with her breech baby and she almost died in childbirth.

But I didn't know what to expect from a vacuum. Basically imagine one of those industrial strength Excaliber hand driers in public bathrooms--the really loud ones you know? Put it in reverse mode to suck. And now consider what it might be like to have, say, a ping pong ball extracted from your nostril with this high wattage vacuum. Let's just say I went banshee for about 20 seconds. BUT---then he was out, he cried, he was healthy, fine! Ben cut the cord and the PICU took a look at him to make sure he was okay.

And he was! Perfect! 7 lb. 12 oz., (exactly the same as Noah). 9 on his apgar test even, for what it's worth.

And when I saw him he had big open, greyish eyes. He looked so familiar. Maybe it was that ultrasound photo of his profile I'd been starring out. Or maybe he looked a lot like a Peterson baby. (Like Seth I thought, with his own flair.) But I felt really at home with him. Like it wasn't the first time I held him. So familiar.

There's so much hype about the birth experience. And when you anticipate the potentially most painful time of your life for almost a year, you can definitely develop hopes and anxieties about it. But some circles talk like if you don't have a beautiful, meaningful experience while contracting that you've ruined your mommy/child bond for life. I really don't think so. Unlike most experiences, the point here actually is the destination (baby out!) and not so much the journey.

With all that said, getting Ezra from womb to world was a pretty ideal experience. It went so well. I was so glad to have a happy, non-anxious birth. So glad my body was able to go into labor on its own. I feel like it did make a big difference for me. And definitely, more than anything, grateful to have him here safe and healthy!

Ezra Oliver

Welcoming Ezra Oliver to our world. 

October 3, 2014

8:35am

7 lb. 12 oz.

21 inches

 

7.5 hours old

36 hours old

6 days old

10 days old

He is a bright-eyed joy. I'm so relieved he's healthy and here. It's miraculous to feel my heart expand so fast, welcoming in this new person. 

My third baby resolution is to worry less, cherish moments more and cuddle as much as possible. :)

Ezra, we love you! xoxo.